[blockquote style=”1″]Together, We Two, Form a Multitude[/blockquote]
Planning a baby? Congratulations!!!
Like any big change, the idea is to take baby steps in planning your baby, too. It always helps to be prepared and aware of what you are getting into and the kind of responsibility you are planning to undertake requires much more preparation and awareness than usual.
While these are important questions which have profound answers, the baby steps include the finer nuances of life that are overlooked in the excitement of planning a new phase of life. Couples generally tend to discuss and contemplate when they think they are ready to have a baby. They get excited about the prospect of a new addition to their family and the changes that will come with the child. But what may get overlooked is the fact that to make a family that stays happy in the future, the foundation needs to be strong in the present. Babies are a complete no-no if your marriage itself is in a state of turmoil.
So, start by working on your own relationship as partners. It is important to keep the romance alive and not make the baby a chore, an assignment. The baby should be a natural progression to life and should not take over the relationship. It is important to strengthen your rapport with your partner before you plan your baby. It is important to ensure that both of you are ready and willing to welcome the new change in your life.
A relationship that the mother has with the baby is a special one and has a magical bond but the most important ingredient of a happy family is a strong relationship with one’s spouse together with whom you plan to bring in the child. It is the relationship that helps build a new one. People become parents when their baby is born but the partners chose each other and decided to bring the baby in the world and make a family.
What is essential for couples to understand is that their little bundle of joy will come with a huge bundle of expectations. There will be financial challenges, there will be role changes and there will be a change in priorities as well. For the mother, the new baby takes up all her time, patience and energy, while for the father – it is more of dealing with changes in the mother’s moods, and fulfilment of emotional as well as material needs. It is never advised to have a baby just because your friends are planning, or your parents think its time for a baby – it should always be a couples’ mutual decision.
So with the changing dynamics comes the challenge of trying to keep the love and the romance alive enough to deal with the monumental changes in life. Couples need to give extra attention to their relationship and nurture each other with interjecting daily life with needed doses of romance.
A few of the tricks to keep the flame burning include planning a date night that is exclusive to each other, not an evening out with friends but an evening of togetherness. Share those spontaneous gestures and overtures that you shared while dating, surprise your partner by giving a compliment or whispering sweet nothings.
The baby planning trips can act as romantic trips as well. Schedule doctor visits with dinner and movie dates and remember to say I-Love-You every now and then.
Do remember to hold hands at all times, while shopping or watching TV, even when not particularly attentive to each other. Remember to hold hands as touch is a very important part of building a strong relationship. And remember… it is a strong and loving couple that makes loving family and provides a good home to a baby.